


a pale branch, seeding

by phantomlistener



Category: Silent Witness (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, Missing Scenes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:15:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25631155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phantomlistener/pseuds/phantomlistener
Summary: Caught in an agonizing situation, Nikki and Eva find comfort in each other.
Relationships: Nikki Alexander/Eva Vasquez
Kudos: 2





	a pale branch, seeding

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Federico Garcia Lorca's [_Gacela of Unexpected Love_](https://www.poetryintranslation.com/PITBR/Spanish/Lorca.php#anchor_Toc485030357).

Nikki hadn't expected this when she followed Eva from the house out to the courtyard gates, had taken a few moments to realise the significance of the flowers and the necklace hanging on the gates - Ernesto's, her son's - had watched Eva collapse to the ground almost in slow-motion. Had rushed to her side as soon as time began to move again, on her knees in the dust and the stones.

“They have him,” Eva said, a catch in her throat. She clutched the necklace in one hand, white-knuckled, the other holding tightly on to the soft material of Nikki's shirt. Her face was half-obscured by the hair which had escaped her tidy ponytail. “They have taken my son.”

It seemed that news travelled fast here: people were already gathering, and Nikki looked helplessly up at the growing crowd, the circle of space surrounding the two women shrinking smaller with every new person trying to get a good look at the drama. Someone at the back of the crowd jostled forwards, prompting a quickfire exchange of Spanish. This place had felt safe, before, but now the group of people hovering helplessly around them felt oppressive, even dangerous. Nikki bent her head to Eva's, whispered, “We need to get inside.”

But Eva shook her head. “Can't,” she said, and her voice was a cracked whisper.

“This doesn't feel safe.”

Eva huffed out a breath that almost passed for laughter, sarcastic despite its near-silence. “It's not,” she said, but her grip on Nikki's shirt relaxed just a little, just enough. “Why would you even think that?”

"They've _targeted_ you," Nikki said, moving to her knees and offering Eva a hand up from the ground. "That makes this different. You know that."

Eva visibly deflated, took her hand with all the meekness of a child and let herself be helped to her feet, led towards the house, Nikki's hand gentle and supportive against her back. The curious crowd - her friends, colleagues, suddenly in the middle of a story they usually followed from the sidelines - followed and caught up, surrounded them both like a buzzing swarm of wasps.

“She needs space,” Nikki said with authority.

But Eva turned a venomous stare on her, clear and determined beneath the heartbreak. “I don't need your help,” she hissed, and her voice was vicious in its certainty; she pushed Nikki's hands away from her, didn't look back as she continued towards the house.

Nobody followed: the crowd stayed where they were, held by Eva's authority and the respect they so obviously had for their friend.

Nikki had no such compunctions. “Eva,” she called, pursuing her retreating form in through the main doors and round to the bottom of the staircase. “Eva, wait.”

“Leave me alone.” She didn't stop walking, halfway up the stairs already, and her voice was strained, hoarse with the obvious effort of holding back tears. “Leave me, Nikki.”

“I _can't_!”

The sincerity in her voice was enough to make Eva hesitate, poised at the top of the stairs outside her bedroom door just long enough for Nikki to reach her. Her hand on the doorframe was shaking; she moved on wobbly legs to the single bed, sat heavily, the fingers of one hand working absently at a loose thread in the dark woven blanket that covered it. 

Nikki sat down next to her, and the old wooden bed frame creaked in protest.

“I told you to leave me,” Eva said, but there was no fight or malice in her voice, just exhaustion. “I must be strong. I told you-” Her voice shattered then, broke into a gasping sob, and she crumbled into Nikki's embrace, arms so tight around her back that Nikki could barely breathe. At the door a congregation of worried eyes peered in, having weighed Eva's authority against the enormity of what had just happened and found it wanting; the whispered chatter ebbed and flowed until someone barked a scolding sentence in Spanish and the crowd dispersed, the door closing in their wake.

Oblivious, Eva held her until the fingers that were wound tightly into her shirt loosened, the desperate grasp becoming something gentler, calmer. She drew back, dark eyes watery and rimmed red with tears, and her hands slid to Nikki’s waist, settled there with an unassuming intimacy. “Nikki,” she breathed, eyes flicking down to her mouth, grief written in every line and angle of her face – and then she was kissing her, salty wet lips against Nikki’s dry ones.

For one exhilarating moment Nikki let herself respond, gave in to the temptation that had settled just out of reach ever since she had first set eyes on this woman strong and confident in the afternoon sunlight. But-

She broke the kiss, eyes fluttering closed in a combination of regret and desire. “You’re not thinking straight,” she said, exhaling a trembling breath. “You’re hurt and scared and this isn’t....”

“What, you think you are taking advantage of me? The grieving mother, too lost in her own pain to be trusted to make her own decisions? Please, Nikki, do not patronise me like that.” She reached for her again, settled her palm against Nikki’s cheek. “I wanted this before. I wanted you. You must believe that.”

Nikki’s expression softened, and she leaned into the warmth of Eva's hand. “I believe you.”

“Then _stay_.”

The desperation in her voice made Nikki's decision for her. “Of course,” she said, sliding out of Eva's embrace and standing up, and Eva looked up at her as if the loss of contact was a physical blow. She settled herself in the carved wooden chair that occupied the little extra space in the room and tucked her feet up underneath her. “You should rest. I'll stay with you.”

Eventually, resignedly, Eva nodded. “You're right,” she said dully. “I should rest.” She curled herself up on the bed and pulled the thin blanket up to cover herself, turned her head away to hide the fresh tears that Nikki could tell were threatening.

“Sleep,” whispered Nikki, and soon her breathing evened out to a gentle sigh, her limbs loose and unguarded.

Nikki crept out unnoticed.

* * *

It was late and Nikki couldn’t sleep. The heat of the day had progressed into a night-time chill that crept under her blankets and through her clothes, pebbling her skin with goosebumps and making her toes feel like ice. With a sigh, she sat up, swung her half-numb feet over onto the cold floor, and made her way quietly to where she hoped the kitchen was.

She was almost halfway there when she stopped, turned in the darkness, certain she had heard something: a footstep, perhaps, the merest hint of a presence lent an almost perfect camouflage by the near-darkness.

“Who’s there?” Her voice sounded loud in the dead silence.

The question hung in the air for an agonisingly long moment, and then a shape detached itself from the shadows, its amorphous bulk shrinking and coalescing into a familiar silhouette.

“Eva!” She hesitated, taking in the walking boots and rucksack visible even in this dim light. “Where are you going?”

“Nowhere,” she said, quick as a bullet. “I...I am just going for a walk.”

“Its almost three in the morning, it’s not safe for you to be going anywhere! What if the men who-” She broke off as understanding washed over her. “You’re going to find them, aren’t you? Eva you can’t, not alone, not like this!”

“You can't stop me,” Eva said fiercely, and even in the thin stream of moonlight her face shone with determination. She made to push past her but Nikki blocked her path, firm and resolute in bare feet and pyjamas.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Eva said, her voice stretched thin with the effort of holding back tears. She raised her fists in a desperate attempt to intimidate, and her clenched hands shook. “But you will not stop me, Nikki, I must find him- I must find Ernesto- I must-” Despite her best efforts there were tears on her cheeks, and her voice cracked.

The punch she landed on Nikki’s shoulder was barely more than a tap, but she followed it with another, and then another, until she was beating ineffectually at her torso, unwilling or unable to put her full strength behind the blows.

Nikki grabbed easily at her wrists, held them safely at a distance. “Eva-”

“You don't understand, I have to find him!” She tried to pull away but the effort was half-hearted.

“You are absolutely no use to him dead!”

“Nikki, please. I have to do something.”

“If you go now, like this, you'll be dead by morning.” Nikki’s hands tightened around her wrists. “Eva. You know this.”

“Then what-” Her voice broke on the question, but she forced it back together with surprising strength. “What do I do, Nikki? Sit upstairs like a good woman, an obedient woman, and wait for my son to die? I have already lost one, I refuse to lose another.”

“You won’t,” Nikki said fiercely. She released her wrists, trusting that her companion was no longer on the verge of running out alone and vulnerable into the night. “What do you do? You make a plan. You make a backup plan. And you get him back.”

Eva looked down at the ground, where the moonlight that filtered in from the kitchen made soft patterns on the tiled floor, and then back up at Nikki’s shadowed face. There was barely a foot of space between them, and Nikki was staring at her with headspinning intensity, determination visible bone-deep in her body. She swallowed, met her gaze, and nodded: “Yes. A plan, that’s good.”

“You promise you won’t sneak out when I’m not looking?”

Eva smiled, soft and suddenly shy behind the tears. “I cannot promise that,” she said, reaching for Nikki’s face. Her fingertips barely grazed the softness of her cheek before she lowered her hand. “Maybe you should stay with me again,” she breathed, and took a step forward, bringing them near enough to touch. “To make sure.”

"To make sure," Nikki repeated. She knew exactly was Eva was asking, knew that she shouldn't, that she should stay away, go back to her cold bed and ignore all thoughts of Eva while she was vulnerable and hurting. Knew too that the woman standing in front of her, determined and brave, was asking for nothing that she didn't truly desire. "Yes, that does sound sensible."

* * *

The bedroom was exactly as Nikki had left it that afternoon, the imprint of Eva's body still visible in the sheets and blanket on the bed, the chair still pulled just a little closer to the bed than it had originally sat. There were still tearstains marking Eva's cheeks, tracking through the faint layer of dust that the sand had piled on like powder, but in the dim glow of the lamps she looked older, more tired, and when Nikki reached for her she didn't resist, leaned instead into the softness of the hand against her cheek and closed her eyes.

“I don't know how to help,” admitted Nikki.

“Stay with me.” The tips of her fingers brushed Nikki's thigh, butterfly soft through the denim of her jeans. “Tonight...tonight I cannot be alone.”

“Eva,” she breathed, staring wide-eyed in the soft, flickering light. The hand on her thigh trailed up to her hip, her waist, and settled there, waiting. “Eva, are you-”

“Am I sure?” She breathed out a laugh, worn through with fatigue and defeat. “Tomorrow we may both be dead. There is no shame in finding comfort where we can.”

“No shame,” came the quiet reply.

Eva leaned forwards, the lines on her face drawn in smudged charcoal relief, impossibly soft in the half-darkness. Her lips brushed against Nikki's.

Nikki made a soft noise in the back of her throat, half surprise, half relief, and kissed her back.

* * *

Days later and she had almost cried out when Nikki took the first sip of the drugged water, almost dashed the bottle from her hand and confessed everything. Almost destroyed the final chance she had to save her beloved son.

But driving through the darkness, Eva glanced across at the innocence of Nikki's sleeping face and prayed silently to be forgiven for what she was about to do.


End file.
